Week 7: Let Your Love Grow Tall

I have now passed my halfway point and am no longer counting up but counting down. I cannot believe the growth that I have already experienced on this journey and I am excited to see how much more I can learn and grow. I apologize if you are looking for a quick read, for the purpose of my family i just cant leave anything out!! Love you all!

June 12, 2012

I spent a few more hours transcribing interviews this morning and then went into the hospital to observe for an hour before we left to go to Agona. We met up with Cassie and Natalie at the Gentle Spot to eat our fried rice lunch and to get a drink, today there were these malt drinks with a pear taste that were soooo good! I don’t ever like soda or carbonation at home but I drink it every once in awhile here because it helps my stomach and I think the carbonation might kill off some stuff that resides in my stomach so I might even start drinking it a little more often. The café was great as it always is and Cassie and I got the best email from Professor Bibb. We had both been freaking out about our requirements and were feeling overwhelmed with the numbers that the syllabus was stating and we felt like we could not accomplish all that we needed to while still being able to focus on exactly what was important. Professor Bibb vanquished all our concerns as she does every week, gave us a little guidance, and told us to keep up the good work so we were both very relieved and I think it is going to be a beautiful week since I feel confident and good about my research progress and about what is going on with the way it is developing and such. Not having to worry about if I am getting the right amount of stuff for a grade makes it all a little bit easier as well because now I feel like I can just really live here and I can just spend my days with the people learning and growing and I am going to try to do 5 interviews a week though tomorrow I have 2 set up and I already did two on Monday so I may even get more than that so things are just going swell. We went to the café later than usual because Cassie had an interview this morning and didn’t get done until really late so the market was super annoying. Usually it is fun and we enjoy just wandering the market and getting all the things we need but there were fights going on with swinging fists and yelling drivers in the midst of all the taxis and everyone seemed super tense and people just kept hitting all our backpacks and not being patient at all because we were apparently walking too slow and so we just felt like we were kind of getting jostled around so we got out of there as quickly as we could. We were not able to get everything we wanted either because the good stuff is gone by the end of the day. the only fruit we could scrounge up were a few bananas but we can have them with our oats in the morning so we are happy about that. Before we got in the taxi we got a sweet bun and a fan milk which is the worlds best and it makes us so happy to eat because it actually tastes super good to us, the sweet bun is kind of like a cake donut but with a crunchy outside and the fanmilk is vanilla ice cream that tastes like vanilla cake batter so its all sugar basically but it put us back in a good mood as we rode the taxi home. All of our laundry was ready to be taken off the line and folded and placed back in neat piles on top of our suitcases when we got home so we got to work. it is really fun to take the laundry off the line buuuuuut the worst part of hand washing is that the soap is never entirely out of the clothes and my clothes are getting wrecked big time. Towels are the worst, they feel and smell super weird and I felt mine this morning when it was still wet and it was just sticky with soap so that’s awesome. My shirts are all 3 times bigger than they were when I bought them so they are all just falling off my shoulders throughout the day because the necks are so wide and the V’s just keep dippin lower, soon I think you will be able to see my stomach so that will be a fun adventure. It’s a good thing I didn’t bring anything I planned on keeping because these clothes are definitely going to get left behind. Washing machines are a dream I tell ya. Once again it was just a spiritual feast reading my scriptures today and I loved every minute of it. Look at this centipede!!!

June 13, 2012

TODAY IS MY HALFWAY POINT! Nuts I say, my second week here I would have told you that this day would never come. Research was great today as I was able to get a lot of good information. I spent a good part of the morning reading my textbook and developing new interview questions and observed with one of the Doctors for a few hours. I really enjoy observing with him and I learn so much every time. I especially learned a lot about malaria in pregnant women and what the complications are as well as the risks and difference in treatment for the different trimesters and such. Malaria is everywhere here, I hear that it is not as bad in the cities for obvious reasons but in a rural community with lots of jungle around it is a huge threat. The worst part of my day today was when a nurse rushed a mother and her child into the room while I was observing. The mother looked terrible and I could see that the baby was in a bad way. The Doctor got up the minute the woman sat down with the baby to get his gloves so he could examine her…to make a long story short the baby was dead when the mother arrived. The mother had been at a health clinic about 30 minutes away and was referred to our hospital but the Doctor said that in the shape the baby was in she should have been on oxygen and in an ambulance but instead the mother was just given a referral and expected to find her own way to the hospital. Looking at the babies chart her temperature was only 2 degrees below normal which had to mean that she had not died too long before the mother made it to us. I did not realize that the baby was dead at first but then when the mother starting sobbing softly I had my suspicions. I did not get a good look at the baby which I am now grateful for because with the urgency I felt from the Doctor I did not want to intrude by peering around the mother. When the Doctor had pronounced the baby dead I wanted to crawl into the corner to cry. The mother just placed her baby right back on her back and tied the cloth around her as every mother does with their child and she walked out with the nurse. I just sat there numb for a moment as the Doctor ran out to call the clinic, he was very upset with how the situation had been handled. The child had malaria. He made a comment about how children should not be dying from malaria in this day and age and I just could not even believe what had just transpired before my eyes. I feel weak now as I type this. That poor mother came in with hope as she prayed that the Doctor could heal the child she probably already suspected as dead. My heart was broken as I thought about the Plan of Salvation and I just wanted to chase after her to tell her that it was going to be okay and that she could see her baby again. I have been so blessed in my life to have never experienced the death of a loved one when I was at the age where I could understand it but my own child, I just do not even know what I would do. The baby was not even one year old, she was tiny. I prayed for strength to continue as I told the Doctor that I felt like crying. He said that as a Doctor you just have to be strong for the patients. You talk about it for a minute and vent your frustrations and then life goes on. And it did, the next patient came in just about 8 minutes later and we continued on. Driving to Wiamoase to go do an interview with one of the teachers at Cassie’s school I was just looking at the beautiful jungle as I always do and my heart was so full of gratitude for the Plan of Salvation and the knowledge that I have about returning to live with my Heavenly Father again. I am sure that losing someone I love will be very hard but not knowing that I would ever see them again and thinking it was the end would be unbearable. Seeing death is something that really changes perspective and hits a place in my heart that has never been hit before.

Jackie and I got to Cass and Nats and Cassie and I headed off to Pats house. When we got there she had prepared a dinner for us and it was so good! The father of a family that lives in Pat’s little compound had just returned from business in China so he had prepared it and shown her how. It was just cabbage, tomatoes, carrots, and a little pepper with meat that looked and tasted like steak. So good. She gave us almost a whole plate of rice which I had to shove in because I felt rude not eating it all but the stuff with it was so good that it was not too hard. Nothing like the mackerel I ate for the first week here. The father came out and was talking with us and somehow we got on the topic of the Gospel. He had read the Book of Mormon but got scared when it came time to get baptized because there is a notion in Ghana that people who join the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints become rich through “juju” or spiritual money. Apparently the members of the church start to become more successful in their businesses and happier in their families after joining the church and all around they start to live richer lives so it puts a stigma on members who join as sort of sell outs. Cassie and I tried to explain to him about the Church Welfare Program and how our principles and values instill hard work and morals into the lives of the members and how it was not the church that was giving them money, but they themselves were learning how to live a better life and that, in turn, could be what is helping them to lead a richer life monetarily speaking. We did not go into tithing but I am sure the families are also being blessed when they pay their tithing but it was the most interesting thing because I never would have thought there could be a stigma against joining the church because you became “rich”. That is just not something I would ever encounter in America and I wonder if the same notion stands in other countries and continents as well. We talked with him a lot about the Book of Mormon because he was under the impression through talking to some anti-mormons, that we worshipped Mormon himself. We told him that Mormon was just a prophet like Moses and that he abridged the Book of Mormon so that is why the book is name after him but that we only worship Jesus Christ. Cassie and I were sitting in chairs across from the man and his wife and child were sitting on the step just diagonal to him and Cassie looked over at me at one point and laughed saying that she felt like a Sister Missionary. We aren’t supposed to preach too much to people here because we are not missionaries but we answered his questions and referred him to the Branch President when he kept trying to ask us more. It was so fun though, I now have an idea about how it feels to be a missionary expelling rumors and fallacies about the church from peoples minds and teaching them about the truthfulness of the Gospel. It is so cool. I respect all my missionaries out there so much, they are doing an amazing work. I got home around 8 and I could not even stay awake to write my notes because it had been such a long day. At home I can get 5 hours a sleep a night and still do hw into the wee hours of the night but here with the heat and the nature of the work, I don’t know why I am just exhausted all the time.

June 14, 2012

This morning I went to the hospital for the clinical meeting but it was cancelled because a team was coming to accredit the hospital today. There are 6 SDA Hospitals in Ghana and ours is leading. People from other hospitals throughout the region come once a year to ‘peer review’ one another’s hospitals in service, cleanliness, and all that jazz. I know understand why our whole hospital was painted, new signs were brought in, new chairs, the tops of the desks were redone, all kinds of things, it practically looks like a different place but it looks super nice; so there was a lot going on today with them. The Doctor who intimidated me before came up to me and talked to me today without me needing to shyly address him and we had a short conversation but there was a laugh or two and it felt so good. I am still not confident enough to ask if I can observe him in his room but he read over my IRB form and told me to take it to the Secretary we she could print it out on letterhead and then he would sign it and fax it over to BYU so I think we took a huge leap today. Observations were good and I had another interview this afternoon and I really love all the nurses and Doctors that I interact with here so it is super fun to be here as I learn more about malaria and the peoples perceptions of gender roles every day even though I always think I have learnt more than there is to know. The good thing about knowledge is that it is endless and there is so much to learn every single day. Walking home from work I was in a super chipper mood as well and talking with everyone on the streets and dancing Azonto was such a joy. Sometimes when I am walking I wish I could just look at myself through a camera from up above to take in the whole picture of where I am and what I am doing. Thinking about the spot where I am on the world map right now is nuts too! I even had a good time writing my hours of field notes today which was certainly a tender mercy from the Lord because sometimes it is so repetitive and tedious that I can hardly stand it, though I think the hardest part is just not having a comfortable place to sit or lay to do it, the actual writing is enjoyable sometimes, like today. I realized that the part of my brain which recognizes language is all clumped into one because a lot of times when I am trying to say something in Twi random Spanish words will pop into my mind and I cannot think of what I am trying to say in Twi because I can only think of Spanish. I haven’t taken Spanish since Sophomore year of High School, I don’t know how that happens. Another great thing about today was that I made a list of things that I miss about America and the things that I love about Africa and the things I love list was longer than those things I could think about missing but man I sure do miss those things sometimes. I just try to tell myself that one day I will be missing the splendor of this place and will be wishing I could take a bucket shower and will be missing going to the bathroom in the dark because I don’t want to see what bugs are lurking in the corners, and being so hot that my clothes are drenched and especially when I have to put on makeup and do my hair again I will be wishing I was back in Africa. This place is truly incredible, this experience is truly incredible. King does these great Azonto dance workouts all the time so tonight I asked him if we could join him and we ended up dancing in the courtyard for about an hour and man it was hard. I was soooo sweaty because the moves he was teaching us were tough and they worked me good. it was so fun though we are going to start doing it more, though I said that at the beginning too and this is only the second time but realllly this time. It’s the best kinda workout and you forget that you are actually working out because you are just dancing your feet off. So fun to have King around!

June 15, 2012

Today I went on an unexpected trip which was quite the adventure. I walked up to the female ward this morning to use the restroom and one of the male nurses started talking to me. We chatted for awhile and then I left. A few minutes later he came and found me and said that they were going to Agona for blood donations and that they wanted me to come so they would be waiting for me. It did not exactly click in my brain what was going on because he said it so fast and just walked away so I went and got my backpack and was directed to the hospital van and I hopped in. It was myself and 6 other men and there the adventure began. In the car on the way there I was still confused because they were all just speaking in Twi and we made a few pit stops picking up various items but when we pulled up to Agona Senior High Technical School it all made sense. It was just the equivalent of a blood drive. We unloaded the van into the dining hall and it drove away. The dining hall reminded me a little bit of ones at Girls Camp because there are just a bunch of wooden tables lined up with benches and the cooks were distributing identical silver pots to every table. The students started filing in and everyone brought their own mugs and glasses. A blow horn siren blew and they all stood up at once then sat back down. One girl at the head of each table dished everyone up their porridge and handed them a piece of bread. They all ate in near silence and the only spoken words were whispered. After a few minutes a girl got on the blow horn and delivered some announcements and then the siren rang and they all filed out. That is when we got set up. I have never had the opportunity to donate blood but after seeing how it is done in these circumstances I will be less scared to do so in the future if I am even allowed to, I don’t know if I will be able to since I’ve lived in Africa. I was put in charge of labeling the Blood Bank bags with blood type and donor number along with today’s date and the date of expiration for the blood. One of the tables was set up for testing the blood type as well as for testing HIV and Hep B, both of which can be transmitted through blood to blood contact.

I have a tiny cut on my foot and bloody cotton balls are just thrown on the ground after being used to be cleaned up later and though they were not at my table I was honestly terrified that I was going to get HIV. I prayed so hard that I would remain unexposed and that I would be kept out of contact with any of that blood because man I was scared. I feel silly now but it was such a real fear at the time. There were about 65 kids who signed up to get their blood taken and the whole process took us from 9 am to a little after 2 pm. Throughout the process there were about 20 male students around me at all times, there were a few girls every once in too. The boys were all from ages 18-25 and they were asking me all kinds of questions about America, some so absurd that I honestly wish I knew where that rumor had started because some of their misconceptions about America are SO WEIRD! But at the same time, they think that America is the land of gold. They all want to go there. They would talk about how they were suffering in Ghana and I tried to explain to them that it is their generation and the next that can make the difference in Ghana. It is all the children being educated now that are going to continue to develop and modernize Africa because that is what they want. They want to lead easier lives and I explained to them that the solution was not to move to America but to work hard to earn all the education that they can so that they can solve their own problems. I explained that the only way for Ghana to continue to improve is for those that live here and understand the way it works to come up with the improvements on their own. Even if I was some great innovator and had all these wonderful ideas with my experience growing up in America, I would never be able to come up with the solutions to fix the problems that the Ghanaians see facing them. It is such a different life here and if you don’t understand every aspect of the way the culture works and what it thrives off of, there is no way successful changes can be made. Some people think that America can solve all their problems but so many people in America and other countries are so incredibly ignorant of the circumstances the rest of the world lives under so there is no way they can come up with solutions to problems they cannot identify with. It just has to be these kids that strive to better their world, that is the only way Ghana will continue to improve and I believe that it will. I too was so ignorant of so many things going on in the world before and I honestly had no idea what it would be like living here. It is a different experience from anything I ever could have imagined. Travel truly is the best medicine for ignorance. I wish everyone had the opportunity to learn about the world outside of their own sphere of existence because there is so much to learn.As the nurses and I were waiting for the car to come get us we got into a discussion about marriage as always happens but this is what they were eating...this is typical street food its rice, beans, noodles, and fish and they just eat with their hands out of bags -->

They were obsessed with me today finding thousands of ways to tell me that I am so beautiful and that they love me and want to marry me, I really commend their creativity. All that talk led to another Gospel discussion because they didn’t believe me when I told them I was saving myself for my husband until I told them which church I belonged to and then they understood. This was not as productive a discussion as some others have been as they were determined on telling me what I believe and would not listen when I tried to explain about Joseph Smith. There are far stranger things in religions around the world than the Father and the Son appearing to a young boy in a grove of trees but they would not listen when I tried to explain that Jesus Christ is the founder of the church, not Joseph Smith. I don’t see how anyone can deny the truthfulness of this Gospel when they see the way we are attacked. Satan works so hard to turn peoples hearts away from this Gospel which is yet another testament to me of its truthfulness. These men made the same comments about the members of the church becoming rich and I explained the concept of tithing to them which made them understand a little bit but one guy made a comment about how a new church building was being put in near his home and it has a basketball court and all kinds of things which are so regular to me but to them, that means that we are receiving juju. It is frustrating when you just want to shake all the false notions out of someone’s brain but have no way to do so. I just pray at night that one of these times someone’s heart will be softened to just listen and not dispute. I hate it when people try to tell me what I believe but testifying of the truthfulness of the Gospel is something that I will forever do. I took out my hair today, it was driving me nuts but Im proud of myself for keeping it in, it took Jackie and I about an hour to undo all the tiny braids, a lot of them were halfway undone already but it still took a surprisingly long time.  

June 16, 2012

Today was super fun! Jackie and I were dying when we woke up at 5 this morning and couldn’t go back to sleep until 7 because there was a little boy in our courtyard being so loud. Of course my iPod was dead this morning as well so that did not help at all. We didn’t have to be anywhere in particular this morning either so we wanted to sleep in since we never get to but on top of that my back was in the worlds worst pain and I wanted to go straight to the hospital to get my slipped disk operated on because it hurts so bad….but then I realized that I was in Africa and that the bed I am sleeping on is not helping my situation so I just tried to put in ear plugs and go back to sleep. When Jackie and I were really awake we just sat/laid in bed for like an hour just chatting. Mama came and knocked on our door telling us we should eat breakfast and we were laughing because it felt like a sleepover when you are a kid and your mom comes up to wake you up and make you get out of bed but the breakfast is usually cinnamon rolls or muffins instead of the same old oats and banana. But it was still fun. We did school work all morning so we could be productive and then left around noon for Wiamoase. We met Cassie at the Secondary School and hung out with the girls at their dorm for a few hours. We went into the room and I swear there were like 30 girls in one room. Their bunks were so close together we could hardly walk through, its crazzay! It was laundry day so the laundry was just strewn across the whole campus and some of the girls were ironing their uniforms for next week. They were ironing each pleat on their skirts and have to do so each week with irons full of coals. COAL irons.

 It was like ‘Little House on the Prairie’ status. We sang songs and danced and just hung out with the girls until we had to go back and meet Natalie. We made crepes again for dinner mostly because Jackie and I needed a break from the past week of bean stew. Were going on day 6 today. They were so good though! It started raining super hard and since we took my hair out yesterday it desperately needed a good washing yet washing with a bucket is extremely difficult and quite ineffective so I was just going to take a shower at their house since they have running water. The rain solved that problem though and I just decided to wash my hair in the rain since it works just as well!
Cassie and Natalie joined me and it was so fun, not to mention the best wash I have had since I have been here. It was the closest thing to a shower I have experienced and I hope I can do it again because it was great!! Then Jackie gave me a trim because i felt like my hair was in the best shape it would be in until i got home so i wanted the ends to be healthy. It was a very fun night. When we got home we just hung out with Mama and King and settled in for the night.

June 17, 2012

HAPPY FATHERS DAY!! shout out to all the fathers out there but especially to mine, I love you Dad! I did not sleep well last night, again. I laid awake for what felt like hours during the night and Mama woke us up early this morning because she wanted to make our breakfast so I have been pretty tired all day. Church today was great as usual even though we don’t understand what is going on for the majority of it but just the opportunity to take the Sacrament and be with the members is nice. It is a bit rough to sit through 3 hours of something you don’t understand though that is for sure. I guess its rough to not understand much of what is going on in speech almost at all times though so that is nothing new in being here. I have come to understand Twi to a certain level but this circumstance does not provide time for a thorough study of the language and it is not like a mission in that sense where you need to learn the language and you know that you will be in a place for an extended period of time so it just calls for a much different focus of learning. I was reading Sheri Dew’s God Wants a Powerful People tonight and there was a part where she talked about God’s perfect creation and how everything fits together perfectly within the world working together to make perfect harmony…just look at nature, yes I am obsessed with it but seriously, there is no way the world just happened with how beautifully nature fits in with itself and with human life. In thinking about that perfect harmony I am reminded of my scripture reading right now. We are in the middle of the war chapters and man are they frustrating. Moroni is the worlds best though, he was only 25 when he began to lead his army and he was able to strengthen and protect his people for a long time with the Lords support but man he was young, its so cool. It shows us just how much trust the Lord has placed in his youth over the years and it gives me strength to know that I can do amazing things even at a young age. In all the reading though I get so frustrated with the Lamanites who have such hatred in their hearts. Reason for them to continuously attack the Nephites is no longer apparent but pride leads wicked men to attack and destroy thousands of people just because they fail so many times and cannot accept defeat. It is disgusting, reading this while I am in Africa, so close to so much destruction and hatred happening on the very same continent makes it all seem so much more real. The news here is much more descriptive and graphic than it is in America. It shows a lot of brutality that happens all around Africa and talks about the unrest in Syria and other places along avenues that would never be shown in America. We are so sheltered at home. It’s a beautiful life really, because some of the things I have seen here on the news I would really rather have not seen ever but at the same time I am grateful that I am no longer ignorant of such things because along with many other things, this experience has increased my awareness of certain issues. It is so sad though to see how there is so much hatred and violence going on around the world and God’s children are still fighting for power and glory just as they were in the ancient days. I don’t know if that fight will ever end until the Second Coming. Peace is just something that the whole world will never have the privilege of knowing as long as Satan still roams around. Ghana is safe though, don’t worry. There have been a ton of ad campaigns on tv with Ghanaian celebrities and sports stars calling for a peaceful election at the end of the year and they really value their democracy and peaceful life here in Ghana so at least there are still pockets of the world that understand what it means to live a joyous, peaceful life. Its just such a shame that there are so many other places where fear dominates the existence of the lives of those who live within its influence.

June 18, 2012

I did not have any interviews set up today since Friday is my planning day and I was swept away to the Blood Drive for the whole day so I did not get the opportunity to set up the week. Because of that I just planned to observe with the Doctors today and hopefully get some interviews planned today but the Doctors were both super busy today so I spent a lot of time trying to chase them down so I could catch them down in their rooms. I did go on rounds in the maternity ward today though and let me tell you these babies are so beautiful. They are so tiny and have the cutest heads of curly black hair and man they are cute. One of the babies skin was so light that she almost looked white minus the hair on her head but it is so interesting how the children are born with such light skin. There are a few people here and there that have a touch lighter skin than others but most of their skin gets dark super fast. I wonder if they would still get so dark if they were living in a different environment because their skin gets so dark in the hot sun and heat of Ghana but I wonder if there would be any change without the heat and the sun here. I went home a little early today so I could get some homework done and the kids were all out at school having one of their breaks, I made the mistake of taking my camera out because within seconds there were a ton of them swarming around me pushing and shoving each other to get in front of the camera. They go nuts! The moms and the teenage boys in their soccer clothes who were waiting for the field were all just watching and the moment I put the camera away and started to shoo the children back to school they were all yelling at the kids to leave me alone. It is so funny to see the way I am treated here sometimes. I wish that just for a day I could be black so that I could really see this culture the way that it is from their perspective because I will always be somewhat of an outsider. I came home and then realized that Jackie had the keys to our room so I just decided to take a nap. When she came home we watched Mari Mar with Mama and then I commenced with my field notes and assignments for the day. When I got up from the couch my stomach was itching me like crazy and I had all these tiny red bumps so I freaked out for a second thinking I was getting some disease but then realized that was probably ridiculous so I asked Mama what it was and she said it was just heat rash but man it was killin me not to itch it so we rubbed some cream all over it and hopefully that will help. I don’t know how people live in this heat for their whole lives. Today was cloudy and breezy and Jackie and I were in heaven but then it still gets so hot at times and according to Mama, the hot and cold brings the rash. I added up all my in country costs today as far as travel and trinkets and food goes and in 7 weeks I have only spent about 300 US Dollars which blows my mind. Cheapest in country costs ever, now getting here was no walk in the park but thankfully my in country cost is not going to equal that or I would really be in trouble.