My heart has been aching for Ghana these past few days. Aching for the simplicity, aching for the love, aching for the sense of self found there, aching for the adventure and the experiences... aching for the life. Being back in America is a beautiful thing but as I reminisce and ponder about those long, hot days, I cant help but smile at all the challenges that contributed largely to the human being that I am today, who I am right now...it has left a handprint on my heart...Ghana helped me to learn about hope. Hope, to me, is a feeling, sometimes even a force that allows my mind to keep thinking, my feet to keep walking, my faith to keep growing, and my face to keep smiling. The rhythm of life in America is so different from the rhythm of life in Africa, in South America, in Europe, in any other country in this big world. I am not meant for the long term African rhythm, there was a reason that I was born in America and why I call this place home, but I cant help but feel so much love for my Ghana and the experiences I was blessed with there. Since being home so many people have asked me if I am ever going to go back and I always think about it for a second but the truth is that I probably won't. The tug on my heart makes me want to go back for a week or so sometimes, but honestly I feel like I got everything I could out of that experience and I want to learn more, to do more, to see more. There are so many opportunities in this world to be good, to do good, and to see good, and I want to be a part of all of it. Many times I wake up and wonder what good I am going to do, what good I can do... simple thought is the first step but it is action that puts things into motion. That hope which compels me to keep moving forward each day gives me the drive to see more and to love more. To act more.
I have read and heard blogs, articles, and comments from people who critisize others who go places and do things. No matter if it is a "privileged" white American going to Africa to help build homes or schools or wells or whatever; no matter if it is a "poor" white American who has raised the money themselves and funded their own trip because they wanted to get out and do something; whether it is an African American, an African, a Mexican, an Austrian, a Guatemalan, a Jamaican, a Muslim, a Christian, a Catholic, whatever...why do people feel the need to criticize someone who wants to get out and "do something"? Not to throw criticism back but those criticising are usually those who are sitting there wishing they had the courage to get out and do, yet they dont have the strength to act, so they sit and criticise instead. I dont care how underprivileged they feel they are, how they might feel that they have gotten the short end of the stick in life or whatever the circumstance may be... this life is filled with adversity, some may think that they lead a harder life but we all face challenges, no one gets away from them. They are just different for everyone. Some may think that is a silly statement coming from someone like me who has grown up in middle class America where my needs were always met and where I have lived most of my life feeling safe and loved, but I know people who have grown up in far worse circumstances who have turned around and done something. I know we can't always control our circumstances but we can control our attitudes (easier said than done, yes I know, but true nonetheless). Anyone can take those challenges and either let them destroy them or they can make them stronger. I choose the latter and I only wish I could inspire more people to do so too.And I know that I am not alone in that. People have an innate desire to serve one another, to love one another, and I wish that this silly world didn't feel reason to tear each other down so much.
In light of the recent attacks on the US Embassy's I have become much more politically aware and have been reading news sources off the chain this week because I am just so intrigued by our wicked world...but because of that, can't we all just be happy for those who want to be good and who want to do good? As I am studying human nature in my major it never ceases to amaze me how wonderful, beautiful, loving, and kind humans are and yet at the same time how critical, demeaning, judgemental, and jealous we are. I am in no way taking myself out of these categories because I have certainly had my weak moments but listening to Elder Holland's CES Fireside the other day really made me think. When we are fighting against so many things in this world, why is it that the thing we fight against most is one another. The Black Eyed Peas were not too far off when they sang Where Is The Love. The example Elder Holland gave in his talk of the boy who came back and played his previous basketball team only to be met with 'boos' and profanities broke my heart. Especially being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I know that it hurts me most when someone of my own faith, who claims to be striving every day to be a disciple of Christ, says and does things that are meaner and cut deeper than those in my experience who may not even be Christians. I guess all I am trying to say is that I want to be better, I want to love more and see everyone as a child of God and I just wish that everyone in the world could do so too. If we could see each other as God sees us, there would be no hatred, and no violence. Yet I know that there must be opposition in all things and where there is good there must be bad also. I just pray that those who are on the Lord's side can continue to strive to be those who are doing good and being good. To be those who act and serve and love. All you need is love after all...and I guess a little humility won't hurt either.
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